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 Men's Dictionary

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Number of posts : 1142
Age : 58
Location : earth
Humor : twisted
Registration date : 2007-08-09

PostSubject: Men's Dictionary   Wed Dec 05, 2007 10:53 am

I'm going fishing
MEANS: I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand while the fish swim by in complete safety.

Its a guy thing.Means: there is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance of making it logical.

Can I help with dinner?
Means: Why isn't it already on the table?

Uh Huh. Sure honey or yes dear.
Means: Absolutely nothing. Its a conditioned response.

It would take too long to explain.
Means: I have no idea how it works.

I was listening to you. It's just I have things on my mind.
Means: I was wondering if that redhead over there is wearing a bra.

take a break honey, you're working too hard,
Means: I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner.

Thats interesting dear.
Means: Are you still talking?

You know how bad my memory is.
Means:I remember the theme song to F Troop, the address of the first girl I ever kissed and the vehicle identification numbers of every car I've ever owned, but, I forgot your birthday.

I was thinking about you and got you these roses.
Means: The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe.

Oh, don't fuss, I just cut myself, its no big deal.
Means: I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit I'm hurt.

Hey, I've got my reasons for what I'm doing.
Means: And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon.

I can't find it.
Means: It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless.

What did I do this time?
Means: What did you catch me at?

I heard you.
Means:I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next three days yelling at me.

You know I could never love anyone else.
Means: I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse.

You look terrific.
Means:Please don't try on one more outfit. I'm starving.

I'm NOT lost. I know exactly where I am.
Means: no one will ever see us alive again.

We share the housework.
Means: I make the messes, she cleans them up.

Some people are like Slinkies. Not really good for anything, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs.
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